Lyrics
The Persian army decided to invade Greece one day.
They had hellof men.
Like more than all the people in your high school,
Like I said hellof men.
They had conscripts from nations of all different kinds:
Egypt
Assyria
Babylon
Turkey
Arabia
Well, maybe they werenÕt so different. But anywayÉ
And also quite a few places from the not so far east
That youÕve never heard of because youÕre stupid.
The Persian armyÕs target was Athens
Which was the birthplace of representative democracy as we all know.
They wanted to sweep it all awayÑ like a broom or something.
A broom of blood and battles, that is.
But those ÒinvincibleÓ Persians hadnÕt counted on one thing:
300 Spartans defending the pass in ThermopylaeÑ
which means Òhot springsÓ in Ancient Greek
300 hardcore, punk-as-fuck Spartans
Were killing those Persians.
Oh you had to have been there.
Fucking Persians and Spartans were clashing
For like three days.
Three hellof long days.
Until the Persian army sent in everything it had;
They overwhelmed the Spartans
And every man was killed
But their hardcore sacrifice gave Greece enough time to prepare for the invasion
What a bunch of nice guys.
And the world was safe again for pseudo-democratic ideals
Oh yeah, we should all give King Leonidas, the dead king of Sparta,
Our respect for saving us that one time oh so many years ago.
Of course some 20 odd years after that hardcore punk as fuck battle we just talked about
the Persians and Spartans joined forces to smash Athens,
but hey, we donÕt need to get into that.
You can just read, like Herodotus, or something.